| Notes |
- Obituary:
John Randolph DEMMINGS
DEMMINGS, John Randolph - of Perth-Andover passed away at Hotel Dieu Hospital on Sunday, December 27, at the age of 91. John is survived by his wife Grace; one son Brent (Joyce) Demmings of Carlingford, NB; two daughters Deborah (Norman) Bubar of Wicklow, NB and Beverly (Michael) Mersereau of Nelson-Miramichi, NB. five grandchildren; five great grandchildren; one niece, nephews and cousins.
John was predeceased by his parents Ernest and Margaret (Cullen ) Demmings, three brothers and seven sisters.
During WWII, he served with the Cameron Highlanders of Ottawa, landing on Juno Beach D-Day June 6, 1944. Followed by thirty seven years service with CP Rail, retiring in 1982
Visitation will be held on Friday Jan. 1 from 1-2 pm. The Memorial service will be held on Friday at 2 pm from Saint. James United Church Perth-Andover. Rev. Maynard Rector Officiating with interment in the Presbyterian Rural Cemetery at a later date.
If desired donations may be made to the NB Heart & Stroke fund or the Saint James United Church. ( Building Fund ). Scott Funeral Home, 815 Main Street, Woodstock, NB entrusted with arrangements. www.scottfh.com
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Eulogy:
Good afternoon everyone and thank you for attending Dad/Grampy’s memorial service. Today Mitchell, dad’s oldest grandson and I will share the life and times of John (JR) . When dad passed away this week my daughter Liana said “I thought he was going to live to be 100” and for all of here, 100 is one of those landmark numbers and my reply was “Grampy lived a long life, he has lived for over 33,000 days “and today Mitchell and I would like to reflect on few of these days.
John was born on the family farm in Aroostook , Oct 8, 1918 the youngest of 10 children. He was a blonde tow head and I am sure an active child as are his grandchildren here today. His early days were spent working on the farm, roaming the woods and streams as well as learning to swim in the Saint John River. Dad was able to perform some of the best acrobatics in the water and he always created quite a stir with his underwater headstands. He enjoyed sports and was active playing baseball. As a teenager during the Great Depression , Dad was industrious with jobs working at Louis MacIver’s general store, or shovelling snow for 25 cents an hour. As with today times were challenging and the calling of young people to military service was a response to new opportunities.
I was asked by my Grammy Demmings to say a few words at today’s service. It is my honour to do so. I have several thoughts that I would like to share with you today.
The call to serve one’s own country drew many young Canadian to a land unknown. In the summer of 1940 at the age of 21 Grampy left his home town of Aroostook with his friend Wilmot Hanscome and hitch hiked to Saint John to enlist with the Saint John Fusiliers . Two years later in the summer of 1942 he left Halifax on the Athlone Castle for Liverpool, England and upon their arrival his troop joined the Cameron Highlanders of Ottawa. The next two years were spent in various parts of England. Grampy told us “One of the highlights of this time was our 48 hour leaves to London and the open pubs in every town.” Imagine a young man from a small village in New Brunswick riding the underground and seeing Buckingham Palace for the first time.
For Remembrance Day 1997, Grampy wrote of his experience and here are his words: “Daylight was breaking as we left Southampton Port, on June 6, 1944. The wail of bagpipes sent a chill of excitement and fear through our bodies. We landed around noon on JUNO beach, many of the advance brigades left a scene of wounded and dead. We were part of the 9th brigade, stalemated briefly only to move on assist in the capture Carpiquet airport. The combined allied forces of the Canadians, British and Americans saw the reclaiming of France.”
He felt a close connection with the Dutch as he spent the winter of 1944-45 living in Holland in a doctor’s home without heat, as they did not want to indicate any presence of human habitation. During the period of liberation Grampy travelled throughout France, Belgium and Holland. After May 5th, 1945 his remaining days in Europe were spent distributing food and assisting people to return to their home countries. Grampy rarely spoke of the war, but he did mention something that I remember distinctly. He once told a story of being in a foxhole during a combat operation. Somehow he said that he was run over by a tank while he was in the hole. Obviously he lived to tell the story.
After the war, Grampy was fortunate to return to Europe three more times to commemorate the end of WWII. He mentioned visiting the Groesbeek cemetery and tracing his previous path in Europe. In 1995, he proudly returned once again in order to attend the 50th anniversary of the end of WWII. He returned one more time in 1999 to France to commemorate the new monument in Caen.
I also have fond memories of being able to have participated in the Remembrance Day ceremonies here in Perth Andover in years past, along with Grampy. Although I have never known the scourge of war, it was a proud moment to be able to wear my Customs uniform, while he was in his Legion uniform finished off with his medals. I remember attending the evening remembrance celebrations as well. Grampy was a proud soldier and a very proud Canadian.
Once Dad returned to Canada on the ocean liner Queen Elizabeth he was offered a job with the Canadian Pacific Railway. His name appeared on the seniority list next to his nephew Clifford and John Pelrine. He initially was a brakeman and later a conductor. Oh how we loved to go down to the caboose and sit up in the cubicle and look out over the train yard , in later years Dad enjoyed doing the same in the dome car of the VIA train. The CPR was a large part of Dad’s life for the next 37 years.
The largest part of dad’s life was mum. The story goes that while visiting his brother Wendell and wife Lorna that he spotted the young teacher with the dark hair at the school adjacent to their home. Mum tricked him and left for Plaster Rock to teach for a year- that must have jumpstarted him to ask him to marry her and in October 1949 they were married. They shared this special beginning with Uncle Irvine and Aunt Edna. Dad quickly became a big part of the Millie family and has played the role of big brother and father to mum’s siblings. As we know marriage is work and over the years Mum and Dad were the best of friends, they agreed to disagree. Many of the heated discussions between them would scare many a stranger but became the banter of a long relationship. Mum and Dad were married 60 years ago this past fall and we were fortunate to have so many family members with us as to celebrate their anniversary Thanksgiving Day weekend.
Our early family years were spent in Aroostook. This gave us the opportunity to play with numerous cousins, hear stories from our extended family on the front lawn and glassed in porch which overlooked the then Trans Canada Highway. When Dad got the call to go to work we would know how long he would be based on the trip. We would inquire where are you going and Dad would tell us Edmundston, McAdam, Presque Isle and Plaster Rock. Of course Mum who is famous for packing “the bucket” would plan accordingly. I can still see the small tin can for short trips and the bigger than a bread basket can for those overnight trips.
Dad sure loved Mums cooking....
Dad and Mum taught us to appreciate the outdoors, we had many family trips camping and we laugh about the time he ignited the mantels of the kerosene heater near Quebec City. Packing up the kids and heading off with our huge tent and gear for the whole family must have taken a lot of patience as we took off on our camping holidays. Many weekends were spent fishing or hunting -of course Brent and I were always falling in the brook and getting wet and he would curse us but always come to our rescue. I’ll also let you in on a little secret- Brent didn’t enjoy cleaning fish or partridge so I would always get the job as Dad’s assistant.
We had frequent trips to Ottawa to visit Dad’s mother and sisters, which began to develop our understanding of Canada and open the world to the little kids from Aroostook. One of the benefits of working for the railroad was the travel pass and Mum and Dad would take the train whenever an opportunity rose, to EXPO ‘67, across Canada in 1977..... In 1992 they joined me in a trip to the California, where dad was thrilled riding on the trolley cars of San Francisco , followed by a train trip along the west coast to Vancouver.
I always liked how Grampy was occasionally referred to as JR . Referring to him as “JR” seemed to me to be straight to the point and had an air or respectfulness to it. That is how I would describe my grandfather. I would also describe him as a man with a sense of humour and a strong work ethic.
I will always remember Grampy as being an independent and healthy individual who always was never shy about sharing his opinion on any number of topics. Sometimes you didn’t need to ask!
When together we would chat about the day’s politics and sports events that were happening. He was always very engaged in current events and would follow the hockey games closely.
Dad was an avid sports fan and many weekends were spent watching Brent play hockey and ball, as well as his favourite sports teams on television. I swear he could make most plays from his chair and was a true Canadian hockey fan. While our big sister Debbie was growing up, she had the “boys” coming to call most weekends. Rumour has it that Dad scared many away but not Norman who joined our family in 1970. Debbie and Norman married in 1971 and today they are here with their children Mitchell and Jill as well as Dad’s great grandchildren Samuel, Meredith and our newest addition to the next generation Adison.
I have some early memories of spending time at Grammy and Grampy’s camp in Riley Brook. Although I don’t recall the stories I’ve heard of me riding my toy duck down the dirt road, I remember later events such as Grampy splitting wood and moving lots of topsoil in the very early mornings. There were times when he would indicate very clearly and very early in the day that it was my time to get up out of bed and help do the same.
Looking back now, he must have been in his 70’s and I remember him being the picture of health. He never complained about the need for hard work and always had his tasks completed.
I also have other very fond memories of time at the camp, especially when he would take me out for a ride in his large river canoe. I would be responsible for providing the lookout at the front of the canoe and alert him to the rocks ahead, so he could alter his path. I would look back and see him standing at the rear, masterfully manoeuvring his canoe around the river, based on my advice. He really seemed to be the admiral of his ship to me at that time.
It was only years later, when I asked to borrow the same canoe and travel on the same river that I was able to truly appreciate the skill necessary to manoeuvre such a long and heavy brute. I gained a little more respect for Grampy that day.
I also have memories of watching the federal election, probably in 1993 at the camp. Grammy and Grampy had a satellite dish there, which I thought was a marvellous thing to have. The results were still coming in from across the country and around midnight I heard a blast from the bedroom, indicating in so many words, that it was time to turn the television off.
Brent’s family joined Dad in his later years and Joyce quickly became another of Dad’s girls, sharing a common work ethic and believing no task is too hard. They worked on many projects together around the house and camp. They have been at the house daily for Dad for the past twenty five years. Dustin and Dave, it’s hard to believe he would let you mow the lawn or shovel as my recollection is that he was always itching to get outside and take care of his yard.
Never to do things in a conventional way Mike appeared in our life in 1996. Dad enjoyed spending time at the Old Mill and watched the house change over the years. He and Mum were at the airport when Hiew and I arrived from Malaysia in June, 2001. He would push Hiew up and down the driveway swatting the mosquitoes away from the little baby. He was there once again when we moved backed to Connecticut being my main babysitter for Liana as we moved into our new house. Liana was with Dad last week, shared a few chocolates, sat on his bed and held his hand.
In the past few days, I’ve thought about the many historical events that Grampy would have experienced during a life of 91 years. Many wars have been fought. Countries have been born. Babe Ruth scored his home run record, the Great Depression took place, the colour television was invented, and the space program allowed humankind to travel outside of this world, the Civil Rights movement took place and the fall of the Iron Curtain. Communication around the world, in most form, is now instantaneous. Travel around the globe is now measured in hours. It is simply incredible the changes that Grampy was able to experience.
The last time I spoke with Grampy in Fredericton, which was a few weeks ago, he was being cared for by a nurse who had come to Canada from Hungary. I listened to him tell her of his time in Europe and the places he had seen. He asked me if I would like to go to Europe with him one more time, I think with his typical mischievous humour. I said I would love to, but at this stage in his life, he said it with a smirk, knowing it probably wasn’t possible.
Samuel
While preparing this eulogy, my son asked me what I was doing. I explained to him that I was writing down some things that I remembered about Grampy John and I asked what he remembered.
Samuel , who is 6 years old, says he remembers Grampy John mowing the grass for us at his house Perth. That means that Grampy in his late 80’s, still getting the things done that needed to be done.
Finally Samuel wanted to say “I love Grampy John”.
Please let’s remember and celebrate the life of John Demmings.
Rest in Peace Grampy.
Thank you.
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People of Carleton County, New Brunswick
1918 - 2009 (91 years)
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